The greener grass the other side...

I was wondering how life is? Or maybe should i say how my life is...
As a child, I was well pampered like any other child who is born and brought in the middle east with all the means by parents could afford to. I always used to fancy the kids' goodies in school and wanted the very same even when i had the very same but of better quality. i always liked things when others had it with them. (I wonder whether there were kids who used to facny my goodies too)

As I grew up, like any confused adolscent even I was confused and everything in life was rosy and beautiful. Right from cloths to friends to careers. maybe thats why my career interests changed from a psychiatrist to an interior designer then a business lady and finally i ended being a show director for television.

College was no different, I always liked the cloths others wore but i realised that i didnt have the body to carry it. i always loved the hair cuts the gurls had but my hair wud just curl up after a hairwash post the cut. uff those days...

it was those times when everyone was falling in love, everyone had a boyfriend. how i envied those gurls who decked themselves up and went out on dates. I always had my mobile phone by my bedside waiting for some prince charming to call in and say that he wants to take me out ( now you know what was the most immature feelings I have had). It was a time when i felt that i too needed a boyfriend to prove myself.

in one of the those several waits and immature attempts- i found that guy who was all that i wanted. a prince charming, the rough and tough guy and the son my parents would want. happiness was no bound when he asked my parents for my ahnd in marriage.
for once i knew that people envied me!

however good things come in small packages and my package was probably too small that i could not even open it- my knight in shining armour rode away and i was left battling with confusion and emotional turmoils. i began envy gurls who had steady boyfriends from years. i began cursing my luck for taking me to such a point which was never there in my wildest dreams.
college was nearing its end and every one had a job, except for me. i just didnt clear the HR rounds. I hated myself for everything. I didnt know what to blame and how to blame!
my life has its own plans, an unoticed test a neglected interview and disinterested rounds of conversations got me a job in Budapest as a show editor.

today i understand that life will give you what is in store for you- no matter what you run behind. There is something like destiny, the grass does look greener on the other side but who said the greenest grass is the best?

Now i realise how much i have missed in this 23 years by not being content with the small joys which life had kept offering me while i was busy trying to reach up for the starts when the moon was right on my lap. maybe this is the part of growing up and learning.

hmm maybe i have not learnt it enough because i am beginning to wonder why is that my parents are not thinking of my marriage as all my friends send me marraige invites and family pictures from honeymoons from far away lands...

Some things will never CHANGE (maybe...)